"Here I am going to tell you a little about what it was like to have gone through Shalom Bait. I remember how I felt drowned, trapped, thinking that I would never be able to get away from the father of my children, despite being separated for a long time he continued to control my life and that of my children from the outside, clearly I was afraid of what I could make us, but tired of his threats after many, many for the first time the idea of ​​reporting, I also felt guilty thinking about doing it because I thought I was doing something terrible against him, I had many mixed feelings. That day I called 144 and they told me about Shalom Bait and I told a friend who also knew him. I remember that I decided to go directly without a shift or anything and they treated me the same, I took the audios of threats with me and made them listen to the psychologist and lawyer who treated me at that time. They told me that I had to report to protect myself, to set a limit in some way, I did not quite realize how many times my life was at risk I had so many normalized situations and experiences that minimize everything that happened.

Knowing the Shalom groups was undoubtedly my salvation, there I understood that I have value, that I am a person with the right to be happy, to live fully and not to survive, that violence does not have a reason but it would have justification and there is none, I heard the phrase "self-love" for the first time that made me noise because I always thought that another person was responsible for my happiness, that kept me spinning in my head and I got there to see what it was about, when I discovered that it was me I realized that I had never received love and it was logical that I did not love myself either, I understood the origin of everything, why patterns are repeated but I owe all this to Shalom Bait, to the girls in the group, we were not alone, we spoke the same language, we had each other, without giving explanations, the only place where we were not judged, only listened and contained, Shalom was a space of much love and containment, a space that I could make my own, it became my place in the world and I felt free , a place who was waiting for us to laugh and also cry.

Shalom taught me that I had many cool things, they always remarked on the good, what I had achieved. I was used to being remarked on how bad I did everything, that it was a disaster and in the group I realized that no, that I was simply doing what I could and how I could, for me it was very important to have shared the group and heard so many stories similar where do you feel reflected, I said to myself wooow you're not so crazy Paola, we are a bunch of us who suffer this violence.

I realized that I was a victim of gender violence while inside Shalom Bait, I would not have thought about it before, I believed that if they beat me or abused me or something happened to me it would be because I deserved it or because I caused it or because things were like that and Ready, but that thought was changed by the group, the psychologists, they explained to us what love was, violence, the behaviors of a violent person and many other things, I managed to see through their eyes and I understood that love does not hurt , It does not hurt, it does not humiliate, love is love precisely, if it is not something else, I understood that emotional attachment destroys you every day a little more, I knew how to differentiate between one thing and another, I began to set limits and not be tied by any bond or blood, or friendship or anything. I learned to love and value myself, I understood that love was inside of me that it was always there, I learned to listen to my inner voice that is the one that knows me the most, trust me and my intuition, I knew what I wanted for my life and what no, I suffered and cried a lot, I also got angry and ranted against the world, against life itself, but it was necessary to destroy myself to rebuild myself, with other foundations, with another head, it was necessary to do it, it was that or I would die trying, I was already Play, I knew, there was something inside me that told me that there was something else, that there was something better, something that I did not know and I went for that. I made decisions and set goals, with fear, sometimes a little insecure but I did the same and when I was achieving my goals I felt full and capable of achieving everything I set out to do.
It was difficult but nothing compares to what I experienced, Hilda and Ester are my saviors I sincerely love them and I owe them my life, I do not know what would have happened to me if I had not found Shalom Bait, honestly I just breathed that is not the same as being alive , the Paola who entered Shalom died the day I killed the voice of the parent in my head, and of all the abusers that unfortunately passed through my life, the day I accepted and overcame my own story, the day I decided to be happy everything that I stayed for life and every day to be my best version because that's why I came to be happy to live and not to survive.

I went through many relapses, but the last one promptly led me to make immediate decisions, I felt that I no longer had time, I felt that I was dying once more, I know that what happened to me was the product of the consequences that so much violence leaves behind, so much physical abuse , so many abuses in my childhood and adolescence, at times I remembered everything that was stolen from me, all the damage and that was where the pain was going through me, believing that I was going to go crazy, many memories, many sensations, aromas, textures and my head He betrayed me, but after my last break, I had a conversation with myself that was where I decided to be and do my best. I decided to stop living with the aftermath that I was dragging like chains, I didn't want anything to handle my emotions and I began to recognize and identify them, that's how I was able to get up once more but with the conviction of being fully happy, it was decreed and so I started again.

But if I also learned something, it is that it is one day at a time, one battle at a time, choosing which front to cover and focusing on that, I am not responsible for what they interpret about me or what they think. Today I focus on being a better person and transmit everything I learned to my children to my grandson and to the people who love me, I enjoy the simple things in life, gray and sunny days although I prefer winter hahaha hahaha, I like to get out of work and eat mustard-flavored fried corn, I like the life I built, I just like to feel happy, I found peace and today I am my own refuge. I like to share memes in my networks in the morning and tell people that today is going to be a great day, I like to get up at 5 in the morning, drink mate alone eating melon and orange, take my dogs for a walk on Sundays at 6 in the morning and my children telling me go to sleep you're crazy! hahaha hahaha, I reconnected with an old love that I had drafted, the exercise that today is part of my daily routine and makes me super good, I changed many bad habits for other very healthy ones, today I am who I choose to be and I am what I do with myself.

Today I have the certainty that life is beautiful and I like to live it like that with all that that means, I learned to see everything positive and what not, it will be solved, I want everything I have and live each day as if it were the latest. I understood that things do not change by themselves, that the one who had to make the change was me and with that the rest, it was the only way.
After so many years in Shalom, so much road traveled, I can say that I made it and that without them it would have been impossible, I owe them my life.

Thank youssss for accompanying me in this process, if you ask me what Shalom Bait is for me, I can only say that it is the beginning of a new life."